A Common Fan’s Sports Diary

This line-up ain't interesting enough

This article was written long before  ‘Ek Khiladi Ek Haseena’ happened on Indian Television. The writer had long wished for a program like this and had put together his dream line-up of stars.

This week I was tormented by an episode of ‘Nach Baliye’- a dance competition involving celebrities. The format is interesting but I cannot say the same for the participants. Most of them were small-time TV stars – celeb quotient too low to create any buzz. Then the competition was not gripping enough, in spite of all the snarling and put-on intensity. Not good enough. So what should be done, given that it’s a format with potential? Well, just bring on the real ‘competitors’ and the real ‘celebrities’ – the sports stars.

There is no denying the competitiveness of a sportsperson; it’s also all-encompassing. Trust them to fiercely compete with their five-year old in a game of criss-cross. And even the biggest film stars play second-fiddle to them (remember SRK not being his usual narcissist self at the Pepsi gold world cup launch)

For those of you doubting their dancing skills, here are some hard facts. The British equivalent – ‘Strictly Come Dancing’ has been won by Darren Gough and Mark Ramprakash in the last two editions. Even the American ‘Dancing with the Stars’ has had a Footballer and an Olympic Champion Marathoner as two of its four winners. Other sportspersons like boxer Laila Ali have also figured in the top-3. All these non-dancers have come out on top against a largely filmy opposition – people who dance as part of their profession. Talk of competitive intensity. And before you mention Ajay Jadeja’s disappointing performance, please note that he didn’t have Waqar Younis’ presence to get his competitive juices flowing.

Rather than have more players on ‘Nach Baliye’, I think it makes greater sense to have a full-fledged competition for the sporting fraternity.

So, let’s go ahead and lay down the ground rules, identify the participants and have our own ‘Dancing with the sport stars’.

Rule no 1 – The celebrity participant has to be a renowned sportsperson
Rule no 2 – The partner will have to be someone who has been in some kind of relationship with the player. We will also consider ‘rumoured’ relationships for the sake of all the paparazzi in this country. They need to make a living too.
Rule no 3- At least one member of every team has be an Indian national

And here are the participants. I have taken into consideration the dancing ability of the couple, chemistry, masala news creating ability, popularity (to get enough viewer votes) and finally their competitive spirit. They are in no particular order. In fact, I would request you to rank them and we can have our very own iSport Reader’s Choice Awards. Other than the first prize for best dancing couple we will also have a special prize for the most entertaining couple.

Sourav Ganguly and Naghma – have we ever had a more competitive captain in this country? I guess not. Has no ‘footwork’ to speak of but I am sure will overcome this deficiency. Has an acclaimed dancer for a wife; but I will still go with Naghma. Dona Ganguly is too ‘technically’ correct for Dada’s good. And Naghma’s no slouch as a dancer having matched steps with the great Prabhu Deva. Sourav’s controversial partner and expected victory celebration (taking his shirt off, a la Lords) should have enough fans rooting for him.
Leander Paes and Sania Mirza – Leander’s got great feet and great hands. On top of that, he’s a master of ‘mixed doubles’. Will pick Sania to partner him over ex-girlfriends – actress Mahima Chaudhary and model Rhea Pillai. Sania’s got more glam and the double whammy from the world of tennis opens up interesting possibilities (a tennis based routine perhaps). They have a proven track-record (the Asian games gold) and extra motivation to give every tennis supporter in this country bragging rights over the cricket fanatics. Competitors beware.

Mohd Azharuddin and Sangeeta Bijlani – Here is a man looking for redemption and with no chance of returning to cricket, will make do with whatever he can get his hands on. Azhar’s supreme fitness and athleticism coupled with Sangeeta’s acting experience will make a heady combination. Expect some energetic performances. As for wristy stroke play, he’ll find Sangeeta too heavy to handle. Not to worry. A stint in Azhar‘s gym and she’ll be light as a willow. That should send the competition on a leather hunt.

MAK Pataudi and Sharmila Tagore – This is a special couple. A cricket playing Maharaja and a Bollywood queen from the great Tagore family. Pataudi’s educational stints at Winchester and Cambridge would have given him a thorough grounding in ballroom dancing – a form which will bring out their timeless grace and be further accentuated by their understated romantic chemistry. This older couple will have strong fan following (even splitting the Bengali votes) and will not go out without a fight (remember that Pataudi was the first captain who taught Indians to stand up and fight)

Sanjay Kapur and Karishma Kapoor – Sanjay Kapur is one of India’s foremost polo players (before you open your mouth in surprise). He has also been voted one of India’s most well dressed (check out the first Indian edition of the Vogue magazine). Karishma and her dancing abilities need no introduction. This is a strong team from a purely dancing stand-point but lacks the over-all star quotient and will start as underdogs. This situation might work to their advantage

Imran Khan and Zeenat Aman – The now single pair would look to re-kindle the passion of 1979. (When they first became an item). The best looking couple in the event; the besotted audience (and even the judges) will keep bringing them back for more. Imran’s a born winner and proven motivator of men (and women). Zeenie baby sure knows a thing or two about dancing (think Qurbani). As for Imran; even his walk to the bowling mark was languid grace. Will have support on both sides of the border.

Bipasha Basu and Cristiano Ronaldo – The competition will lose an Indian viewer (John Abraham), but this pair will add an international touch and bring international audiences in droves. Ronaldo’s deft footwork will leave the audience dizzy with delight. It would be the second coming of Super Soccer. Bipasha will have a lot of man-marking to do. But I am sure this Bengali damsel knows her football pretty well.

Ravi Shastri and Amrita Singh – the last time they were together, he won the Champion of Champions in Australia. Shastri is well known for punching far above his weight and an encore cannot be ruled out in this competition. Will have to avoid the ugly ‘Chapatti shot’ though. Amrita has made a return to acting and will be in fine shape for this competition. She will have extra motivation to beat her former in-laws as well. Their favourite dance form – a fusion of Koli and Bhangra styles.

This is quite a formidable line-up. I have purposely not given my rankings as they will create a bias. Please play judge and vote for both categories. Best dancing couple and most entertaining pair.

This article was originally published on iSport.in in September 2007.

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A player like Wesley Sneijder could really improve the United squad

Dale Johnson of ESPN Soccernet reckoned that Man United need the trio of Franck Ribery, Karim Benzema and Antonio Valencia to compensate for the creativity and goal-scoring that was earlier single-handedly provided by Cristiano Ronaldo. The 80 million pounds that United got from the Ronaldo sale wouldn’t have been enough to get all three, though. And, now with Benzema gone to Real and Bayern refusing to budge on Ribery, Johnson’s hypothesis is irrelevant.

So what should Man United do?

Man United should not lose sight of their other squad requirements in trying to find a suitable replacement for the Portuguese. There will definitely be a downgrade at his position – something which will adversely affect the over-all composition of the side and its performance on the pitch. After all we are talking of the most expensive player in the world here. But his loss can be compensated handsomely by upgrading a number of other positions which need attention. United need to upgrade at the right-back position where Rafael da Silva is promising but not fully equipped for the big games; atleast not yet. They also need to find suitable replacements for Ryan Giggs and Paul Scholes, who made huge contributions last season but might not able to deliver at the same level for too long.

Man United are quite capable of attracting top talent having both the money and the pedigree to do so. Real Madrid are mostly done with their signings and save for Man City, which few players want to join, nobody has the cash to dole out.

There is a fire sale happening at Real Madrid with a truckload of Dutch internationals being made available by the club which happens to have 10 squad players too many.

Amongst the lot, Wesley Sneijder, Arjen Robben and Klas Jan Huntelaar make a lot of sense for United. Sneijder is the goal scoring, powerful driving midfielder that Paul Scholes was and Michael Carrick will never be. Robben is injury prone but has proven to be devastatingly effective in the premiership with Chelsea. Huntelaar has been coveted by United previously and will be a long term solution.

And then there are others. Brazilian Maicon is a world class right-back whose overlapping forays will seamlessly blend into the United attack. He is looking out but doesn’t seem to have a lot of suitors.

Even if United fail to get these players, there are others who Fergie can go after and who will still be a substantial improvement over the current lot.

The argument is simple.

The downgrade at one key position is inevitable but if that happens in tandem with improvements in other areas of the pitch, than it should ensure that the sum of United’s squad will continue to be as whole as before.

Time to look at all the sup-plots from the 2009 Champions League final

It’s a little late to be doing this and it hurts as I remember the match but I needed to write this. So let’s quickly get this over with.

The White Jerseys

I am not implying that United lost because they played in white and not in their traditional red. But I can’t remember United winning a major final playing in white. There had been a lot of talk of United never having lost a major final but someone forgot to mention that they had actually dressed as the ‘Red’ Devils for all those finals they won. I didn’t have a good feeling as I saw them come out of the tunnel in white. I think it’s unfair to let only one side wear their home colours. If the jerseys clash then ask both to wear some other colour.

Memories of the 1994 Final

Barcelona were missing most of their defensive stalwarts and were expected to be vulnerable at the back. And then when United started in whirlwind fashion it looked as if a repeat of the 1994 final was on the cards. That was when another Barcelona side dubbed the ‘Dream Team’ had been played off the park 4-0 by AC Milan. Suddenly, the white jerseys looked like a good omen –Milan had also played in white ‘away’ jerseys on that night in 1994. Sadly, all such hopes vanished when Eto’o scored.

Memories of the 1999 Final

Even the commentators kept mentioning this. First there was an early goal like in 1999. Then United failed to mount a strong comeback finding no rhythm whatsoever. Van Der Saar, like Schmeichel in 1999, kept his side in the game preventing Barca from scoring again. And then it looked eerily similar when Xavi hit the post, just like Mehmet Scholl had done ten years ago. Then Messi scored to ensure that there were no more similarities.

A story of two tackles

United’s defensive lapse in the first goal has received less attention than it should have. First they allowed Iniesta to go on a long surging run with no one making an attempt to close him down or tackle him. The diminutive midfielder managed to thread the perfect pass to Eto’o who easily beat Vidic’s wild tackle and scored. A little while earlier, having been beaten by Ronaldo, Pique body checked the Portuguese to stop him from entering the Barca box unattended. United were supposedly the stronger defensive side but on this night Barca made the more important tackle.

Pique – from not good enough to too damn good

Unable to give him regular first team football, United let Gerard Pique go to Barcelona for almost nothing. The Catalan has since established himself as the defensive mainstay of Barca. And on this night he marshalled the makeshift defence superbly and single-handedly outshone the pair of Vidic and Ferdinand. Apart from the body check, he made a crucial block and was there to snuffle out every single one of United’s attacks. When United loan out players, they stipulate that the player cannot play against the Red Devils. If only they had made a similar agrrement then they let Pique go to Barcelona

What about Cristiano Ronaldo

How does this performance affect his plans to go to Madrid? He conclusively lost his ‘best player in the world’ battle with Messi. Going to Real Madrid gives him two guaranteed shots at renewing the rivalry every year. He might not get a chance to do that United in the near future. On the other hand, United have a good young nucleus which will return to many more finals and Ronaldo will always be the centre of their attack and of media attention. He is the crown prince of premiership football. He will have to challenge Messi for that title in Spain. And with Raul still around, he will not even be the numero uno star at Real Madrid. Alex Ferguson always learns from his defeats and will do everything possible to ensure that Ronaldo and United are not humiliated like this again. There is a very good case for him to stay back at Old Trafford

A depressing night for United

United have been embarrassed in Europe before, most recently by AC Milan in the second leg of the2007 semi-final. But this was worse. This was the biggest stage of them all – the final between two champion sides – two sides who take pride in playing attacking football of the highest quality. Other than losing the title of European Champions, United were also embarrassingly rendered as toothless and impotent as they failed to even make a match out of it.

And as Red Devils, who have been feed on a diet of beautiful one touch passing, you couldn’t even hate Barcelona for displaying something that you have long admired. And that made the experience even more frustrating – you couldn’t even vent your disappointment at your opponent. Hats off to Barcelona for having managed to do that

What were United missing?

Last year, I did an analysis of United’s European defeats and they showed some common traits, most notably an absence of mid-field toughness and lack of leadership on the pitch. The currently injured Owen Hargreaves had been signed to give steel to the mid-field and protect the back four. Anderson has been a suitable replacement on most occasions but on this night his inexperience clearly showed. As for their leader, Rio Ferdinand, he wasn’t even a patch on the likes of Roy Keane and Gary Neville.

And finally

The defeat takes nothing away from the fact that United had another fantastic European campaign with some memorable wins and have the side to be back in many more finals. Alex Ferguson has built a wonderful side which on most nights can compete with any side in Europe. Thanks to Fergie and his men for giving us another season full of great European nights.

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Man United are champions but Chelsea are winners too – 2008 Champions League final

What match-up do you want to see in the Champions League final

This year's final is bound to have a mouth watering match-up

The Draw for the Champions League Semis; Chelsea- Barcelona and Man United – Arsenal, while mouth-watering in itself, sets up the possibility of a very interesting finals match-up. Each of the four possibilities is extremely fascinating; both in terms of the action on and off the field, the history between the two sides and the other associated story lines.

The football fans are really spoilt for choice here.

So let’s look at each of the 4 potential show downs and identify the reasons why we would want to see a final featuring these two sides.

Chelsea – Man United – These two sides gave us 120 minutes of attacking football in last year’s final – a rarity in ECL finals and therefore, this match-up would be the first choice for those who are bored of the safety first defensive approaches which are the staple of such occasions. This would also pit two of the greatest managers of the last 20 years, Guus Hiddink and Alex Ferguson, and that would be a real battle of wits. And finally, there is the revenge and redemption angle as well, a chance for John Terry to exorcise his worst nightmare. Man United’s successes over Chelsea in the last two Premier league races, in the last ECL final and in their last encounter has resulted in the sacking of Mourinho, Avram Grant and Phil Scolari respectively. Another triumph could bust all the euphoria over Hiddink and herald the arrival of yet another new manager at Stamford Bridge.

The battle Royale

Man United –Barcelona – This final would determine a lot of things. The battle between two of the most dominant and attack-minded teams in Europe would settle the debate, about who are the real Kings of the continent. As the leaders of their respective leagues, this clash will also be billed as the showdown between the Primera Liga and the Premier League. The two best players in world football, Lionel Messi and Cristiano Ronaldo would come together for a long –awaited duel which will give one set of supporters the bragging rights as the fans of the best player in football. In addition, hostilities will be resumed between United and their old foe, Thierry Henry.

This final could prove one man right

Barcelona – Arsenal – As the rematch of another final, the 2006 one, this match will also re-kindle passions of revenge and deliverance. A much greater twist will be added by the presence of Thierry Henry. Losing the 2006 final forced Henry to leave Arsenal in pursuit of trophies. A win would justify his decision, although it will be ironic to see one of the greatest Gunners ever, denying the club, their long awaited place in the annals of the European greats. A loss would make the Frenchman a massive loser – the only person to end up on the losing side in both Barcelona – Arsenal finals. An Arsenal win will be doubly sweet for Arsene Wenger as the triumph will vindicate his decision to let Henry leave rather than compromise on his youth policy. It will shut up his critics once and for all.

Arsenal – Chelsea – Thanks to their lack of European pedigree, these two clubs are the second class citizens of the Premiership Big 4. After this final, there will be only one set of supporters suffering from an inferiority complex. It will also be a contest of two contrasting philosophies – the most frugal big name club in Europe with an unwavering belief in the power of youth and the biggest spenders in the history of the game with a penchant to throw obscene money at established superstars. Liverpool and United have foiled Abramovich’s European ambitions in the past and Arsenal could become the third English club to do so, also becoming the third Premiership side to win the title, the Russian craves the most, since the time he heralded the Russian revolution at Chelsea. It could well be the final straw that breaks the camel’s back.

Personally, I want to see United play Barcelona. You tell us which final match-up you want to watch.

United should let Real Madrid have Ronaldo if they can get a fortune in return

And finally, a fair portion of fans also think that United could do well to make the most of this opportunity. I guess most of these are United fans like me, who can see the benefits of a mega transfer kitty – which Ronaldo’s move to Real could bring. United could use that money to buy a right-back, a striker and also pay for Carlos Tevez’s transfer fee. They haven’t managed to ad a single player to their squad this year. The heavy expenditure made last year seems to have tied down Fergie’s hands this season. And how good is a disgruntled superstar. And nobody will pay more for Ronaldo than Real Madrid. The first two options will give us (United fans) a lot of wicked pleasure but option three is most beneficial for the club. Man United and their manager should just shed their pride and sell Ronaldo to Real Madrid for a fortune.

The Ronaldo on the left could repeat what the Ronaldo on the right did in 2002

United believe Cristiano has enough reasons to stay at Old Trafford.

Beware !!!

There was a good reason to believe that ROnaldo would also not want to move to Real. He had just been through 20 months of rehab. Inter Milan had been fully supportive, not only paying his full salary but also his medical bills. Ronaldo was expected to feel grateful and stay at Inter. But he got lured by Real. Such is the attraction of Real.

Now for the scariest part

In exchange for Ronaldo, Real gave Inter 35 million euros and the option to take one of two players – Steve McManaman or Santiago Solari. The valuation of these players was put at 10 million euros each, thus making Ronaldo transfer value 45 million euros.

Fair deal? Not really

Inter Milan choose Solari but the player refused to join the club. It took more then six months and a lot of trouble before Inter finally got hold of Solari. The player, however, was a disgruntled man and his frustration showed in his performances. He was a shadow of the player he was at Real. It became a bad investment of 10 million for Inter.

Now for the remaining 35 million. Real Madrid paid one instalment but defaulted on the balance payment. Inter had to go to FIFA and another painful saga ensued. Finally, Real compensated Inter by giving them another player. Needless to say the player was highly over-valued for the deal and did not make a name for himself at Inter. A bad deal became worse for the Italian club.

So as a Red Devil and a well-wisher of Man United, I have just one piece of advice for Sir Alex and his legal team

United should not settle for mediocre players like Solari

Please note – The right-footed guy in Blue is playing left-back for Portugal

Deco’s signature just became a hell lot more expensive

Deco is another. Already on his way out of Barcelona, he will have more suitors then he can handle if he continues in the same vein. And then there is David Villa. Rafa Benitez would be kicking himself for not signing him when he was available for far less than what he would cost after this tournament.

On the flip side players like Karim Benzema could hurt their transfer valuations if they don’t improve their play quickly.